Mind Your Eeenglish

A month ago, I was at the DVD shop when I saw a pirated copy of 27 Dresses. This quote was displayed in huge font on the cover:

Bland. Hard to believe this came from the writer of The Devil Wears Prada.

Oh dear. BLAND. I almost felt sorry for the person who designed the cover. It’s as if the DVD is whimpering, “I’m lousy, please don’t buy me…” Who would want it? 

If you don’t know the meaning of a word, you can’t just lift it and use it liberally. In fact, when I come across a new word, I like to see it applied several times in trusty sources before I use it, to make sure I get it right. Besides, surely the designer must have known that not every movie review is complimentary? How could he commit such a big boo-boo? 

But nevermind, it was just a cheapo pirated DVD (and I bought it anyway).

On another occassion, I bought this made-in-China correction tape that had “Do not the edibility” proudly printed on it’s body.

Note: it wasn’t even “Cannot ate” or “Don’t eaten”; of all erroneous phrases it had to be the most complicated “Do not the edibility“!! It made my eyes pop out and I fell about laughing.

Seriously, don’t pepper everything you write with bombastic words if you don’t know how to use them. And in this case, if you’re so paranoid that people will mistake your unappetizing ribbon of correction tape for sotong strips, why not write it like they do on silica gel bags? DO NOT EAT! Loud and clear. And easy for a 3-year-old kid to understand.

Haih.

p/s: I think I’m really going to do journalism. No more changing of minds from medicine to psychology to business to tourism management. (Note the downgrading.) If I don’t get into NUS/NTU, should I go to Monash, or Taylors? Hmm? Can anyone tell me? Or maybe, even if I do, by a sheer miracle, get into Singapore, should I go back to the land that taunted me for 2 years? For some reason it seems attractive all over again.