Some time ago I was chatting with a friend, and he purposely asked me a question to see if I was an open book.

Evil, but fascinating.

People have said that I blog with utter candour, revealing personal things about myself they wouldn’t imagine sharing.

Well…I don’t know. I guess I am a deep person, and writing helps me express things that would be too awkward for me in real life conversation.

But if you assume you really know me from reading my blog, I’m sorry. There are things I don’t publish; either because they will do irreparable damage, or because they are simply private and precious. Or maybe they’re too mundane. Mostly my blogging is selfish, but once in a while, I share something humiliating in the hope that it will help someone out there.

But ma called today imploring me not to blog carelessly anymore. Apparently the Alor Star rumour mill has been busy grinding the story that “Jasmine Yow something wrong oredi and cannot study”.

And guess who has to bear the brunt of it. Guess who will be blamed. Guess who has to answer questions and “concerned” phonecalls.

I warn you, you can think whatever you want of me, but don’t upset my mum. Stop bothering her. It makes me angry.

You want my exciting news? You come to ME, and you read my blog carefully. You don’t spread false rumours.

Maybe I already knew this would happen from the start. If you’ve been with me since 05 you would’ve known about my infamous Chinese post. Which I was persuaded to delete. Heh. Maybe this time it’s my subconscious way of getting back at my mum.

Sighs. As you can see, I’m posting a lot. Because I want an audience, and because writing is the most pleasurable and productive thing I can do right now.

This week has been torturous. My paper was horrible. And I’m not talking about the paper per se–the sitting in the hall, the restlessness, the unease…you will never understand.

I have decided not to sit the full 3 hours for my econs paper. I’ll do whatever I can and then walk out.