Today, I am sick.
The second time in three months where my body cannot (poor excuse maybe?), simply refuses to get out of bed.
I talked to an old friend yesterday and she commented it seems I’m always either tired or sick. I wonder why it seems I’ve become weak? I hate it.
But four people messaged and rang me today within an hour of me not showing at church.
Tiffany, the wacky, blunt, and waifish arts student who has at least 3 cameras and uses old school film. (OK actually I messaged her to say I wouldn’t be waiting for the bus with her. Tiffany you never ask me how I am also, lousy.)
Louis, the black-shirted deformed nose—> :3 See how big his nose is. Louis is the cutest 18-year old ever, because the law and media student wants to be a politician. Optimism untainted by cynicism is always precious, cute. And some people say you’ve gotta be crazy to want to be Prime Minister.
Michelle, who just turned 25 hahahhaa!!! She always calls me sweetie. Who is honest, caring, lovely, accepting, and generous with her time. At least generous towards me lah to others I dunno. Hahahha. Whom I have gradually developed a solid trust with.
And Ben. I respect him because he is sensitive and unselfishly loving to everyone, as far as I can observe. He can be very blur, and at times he morphs into Powerpuff Girl characters.
This is gonna sound horrible, but I think, I am inherently suspicious of caring people. I always suspect an ulterior motive, especially if they are religious. I suspect they want to manipulate me. Or guilt me into becoming more committed. Or lure me into their, I don’t know, trap?
It’s not easy to trust when I’ve grown up in an atmosphere of high expectations and little mercy. It’s not easy when I’m still learning to give without expecting approval and god knows what else I demand from people.
But I’ve come to believe these people and the care they freely give. Either they’re damn good at tricking me, or they’re a truly accepting and loving community.
But they don’t seem like tricksters because they don’t make too big of an attempt to hide their flaws.
So today I realized, I’ve finally found a new family in Adelaide. Unfamiliar in so many ways, but I’m gradually accepting the new normal.
And so many characters are there!
There’s Albert, the smiley face who says the most politically incorrect stuff with a straight face, like “sorry I wasn’t paying attention because I was paying attention to the guy on the phone over there.”
Vincent, the passionate ball of fire who can be embarrassingly SILLY at times. Actually most of the time.
Daphne, unassuming, posing a quiet challenge for you to go talk to her, get to know her, and bully her.
Doreen, the lovely giver of hugs and tong shui.
And then there’s So-Young Andy, secretly-Asian Jo, comedian KJ, Quack-quack musician Chris, White-jacket-long-fringe Reuben, round-round Malcolm and cute-cute Margaret, Cougar Jackson, cheerful Miin…so many la OK cannot finish listing.
When I think of everyone with their quirks, who gives in big and small ways in their own journeys, I am thankful.